My moodboard, a continuation.

These photographs around myself to understand this inner conversation with  everything around me..

Painting my moods, paintings emotions, paintings from the inside, there are also times when I just have to stop..

For me, the environment from which I am creating have a direct effect on me. lots of sun here (30 degrees Celsius about everyday), lots of colours too. I feel very attracted to the green (yes, I have been buying lots of things which are green too; is there a connection?), my paintings have this dominant shades of green everywhere..

Is painting important to me?

Is painting important to me?

I think yes. I think by self-analysis, one can get the answers that have been there all along. My looking at the whole of myself and then by thinking about my art, I can now understand how I eventually started to paint. Deep inside I can understand this logic. There was something wanting to come out. What I remarked was that there was a chronological sequence of events and turning to this technique was like completing a full circle.

I feel my art is turning itself into a festive celebration. There are times I even find it to be interlinked with spirituality too; as if my making experience has become close to a kind of meditation.

I WANT TO UNDERSTAND MYSELF BETTER…

I also feel a sense of accomplishment by looking at my works. My work also feel meaningful to me.

However, I also feel in control of my decision. I feel that I can move on and recreate my set of rules anytime I want to.

MY SET OF RULES:

I want to think on this; this is only the foundation of myself as an artist. I always wanted to remain versatile in my art. Was this why I was always resetting my set of rules?

I do not think being versatile is the answer. Because everything takes on its own time to develop and mature. I should also try not to be ambitious. Thinking too much can also be pointless, stressing and hence harmful.

This “why?” issue is also interesting; however I deeply feel that some things are better not explained about… I can understand why some artists as Cindy Sherman for example most of the time do not give explanations about her works.

Making Day 07 February 2015.

Starting Point:

This is something that I had at the back of my mind. I wanted to try some linocuts and for this making day; I really planned for it. I went to an art store and bought all the stuffs needed as I didn't have any. I couldn't get the proper ink in time for the day; however someone told me I could do just fine even with acrylic. As my paintings I did no preliminary sketches because I was sure I would be "finding my way" without much difficulty and started the work "with a thrilling mind".

I  started with the cutting process and I enjoyed this activity too as I felt I could handle the tool with much ease and all was coming out quite smoothly. Here is carving process at different stages:

 

 

 

The carving lasted about 45 minutes. Carving has always been a soothing experiment for me. I feel very light and calm while doing it and I now feel that I have come to point where these little thoughts about how I feel about my making is all starting to make sense to me.I feel that I am looking at myself from the inside and understand things at a deeper level. 

I tried my first print-outs. These were not so successful, however I felt good because they were like guidelines to make me understand about how to spread the paint and how to get uniform prints. I was also having problem with my papers as they were too thin and some were getting torn in the process. I had to change to thicker good quality papers. As this time, I felt time running out as I had to clean my blocks several times and apply the paint again.  

This little red print was amongst my first prints. I like the feel of it and it looked promising. I still felt time was running out as I cleaned my block and started the carving for the next stage for my second application of colour. I also remember feeling stressed as I felt I had to remain calculating to forecast about what had to be left out and what spaces had to go. Here, what was really important was to keep a balance in the composition. 
 


This is the Stage Two:the second application of colour. I like the feel of what came about because I felt the balance between the white and the two colours. I also felt the "rawness" of the cuts and I was quite happy with the textural effects .

 

About three hours of work at these stage. I remember taking notes about what was happening; however I also remember feeling frustrated about not being able to upload all the photos about what I was doing. For me this process was really an important matter and I wanted to share it with everybody. I also felt I was being overambitious for choosing such a difficult technique without anticipating about what could go wrong. Here was the stage where my fears were surfacing out. I then decided that I could mount a quick power-point so as to show the process in the right manner and also to show the link this activity with my actual making which I think is quite important too. This is the last stage where I cleaned my block and carved the remaining part that I wanted to take out. I would like to say that what I was trying out here was also risky in the sense that I should have calculated/ anticipated my moves on paper before carving things out. However, I really felt out of time...

TO CONCLUDE:
This was an important  experiment. I was perhaps assimilating so many things at a time that I really felt that I needed sometime to write this down and understand its full impact in my making. The end product was satisfactory; however to me the process was more important. I also feel I can do better. This activity has given me a clear-cut indication about my thought patterns. It has also given me hints and indications about what I really care about in my work and what becomes unimportant while taking on the spot decisions. As I very seriously said to Caroline, I still have some lino blocks left and I would most probably repeat that in future. Amongst the matters that I have been pondering right now is the fact that HOW EVERYTHING GETS TO BE INTER-RELATED, and how one work is always feeding on the previous one and so on. I have even considered these thoughts at a deeper level; as spiritual consciousness. I feel so surprised and also a little taken aback at how everything gets to fit perfectly into place even though I know they are coming from my subconsciousness... 

Some Thoughts...

Source..
My moodboard:

http://izismile.com/2009/04/23/underwater_world_39_photos.html

Life under the sea has always been of my interest. Underwater life in Mauritius is so rich of colours it has always filled me with wonder and I have always sought to learn Scuba Diving. I think this is what I subconsciously sought for..Is there a glimpse of this in my work? 

YES. I think my painting has changed in a way from last year; it has become more complex and intense and very autobiographical in the sense that they reflect so much more from myself: my surroundings,even in trivial things like personal belongings: very intimate and personal.. They are also less subjective. I also feel this change as a gradual one, it is all very interrelated, as if one work was feeding on the other...

Another aspect to discover: SELF-DISCOVERY AS A PROCESS...
DISCOVERY- this is something to think about too. To the question "Why do I like my works to be difficult?" I answered to Angela that by choosing the difficult route, I get to LEARN. To this I would like to add that I also like to be excited about what I'm doing, and this can happen only with discovery. One of the main reason why I am so close to art is really because I would like to remain in wonder of the things that I would be discovering. As an art therapy also I guess.. 

A Glimpse of Task Three..

Each painting is 60cm by 80 cm. I have completed four of them and the fifth one is almost complete. I am planning to complete more( about ten or more) where they would all be looked at as a whole. I like this idea of the space of a room containing one work.Right now, I feel lots of potential in this work. It is also exciting to have ideas emerging as I work on and to anticipate how the finished work would finally be like...  

Quick Making: The Spontaneous Feel.

"That which were born to become exists as a seed inside of us and the challenge is to liberate this potential" Susan Bello. The I.am. I

These some quick works (about ten minutes each) which were executed rather quickly as I wanted to experience "the spontaneous method".  This is where the mind becomes engrossed with an intense feeling to put fleeting ideas on paper and it is always interesting to note the output. The artwork exists on its own; it is not bounded by the judgement of others. Personally, these types of activities always makes me feel good, and also makes me confident to believe in the intuitive voice inside myself. Through these kinds of activities, I also find a sincerity: of meeting with my true self.